These boots were made for talking
As editor of Women Grow Business (disclosure: client, which I love), I come across remarkable blog posts every day.
This is because the contributing bloggers are all remarkable women, and I am truly lucky to be able to see life through their eyes. And I try, as much as possible, to let their voices come through; as a result, my editing is usually minimal.
Even with the extremely high quality of posts I’m lucky to edit, one really stood out to me last week. It was Robin Ferrier’s Social is as Social Does, where she asked, point-blank:
You know the difference between Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, and blogs. You have an idea about how you can and should use each one. You know the standard refrain: Social media is about talking with – not talking to – your audience.
But are you walking the walk?
What do I mean?
It’s not just about whether you’re using these different outlets. It’s about how you’re using them. More importantly, it’s about how you’re interacting on them.
Ask yourself these questions:
Are you commenting on other people’s blogs? Have you commented on more than one posting on this site? Or other blogs?
Are you engaging in conversations? For example, are you responding to other people’s tweets with your own thoughts on a particular issue? Are you RT’ing other people’s messages?
Are you commenting on Facebook status updates? And more important, are you SHARING other people’s status updates with your community?
Because it’s not enough to be in the social media space if you’re only there to project your message.
I was struck by the directness of Robin’s question
and have been thinking about it ever since.
The truth is, we can all stand to be more social. Not by paying each other lip-service, but by really trying to see if we are interacting to the best of our ability and, if not, how we can kick that up a notch.
I like to think that I’m pretty social. I try to respond to all the messages I get on Twitter, Facebook and Amplify (the social platforms on which I’m most active), share and comment on interesting posts, and so on.
But this got me thinking: what could I do to kick it up a notch?
Now, I do think there’s a difference between being social, sociable, and ramming one’s self down the Interwebz’ collective throat.
But I’d like to think that most of us focus on the former, as opposed to the latter.
I’m going to keep thinking about this and share more thoughts soon, but what do you think?
How do you walk the social talk? Please do share via a comment below, so that we can continue the conversation and learn from each other.
[…] accepted norms and professional standards of practice. There are times when you’re not walking the talk, when you are doing it […]
[…] again, the comments on the two posts preceding this one were quite […]
[…] I wrote about walking the social talk last week, I had no idea what a terrific discussion it would […]
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Dan Perez, Dan Perez. Dan Perez said: Are We Walking the Social Talk? Does It Matter? http://bit.ly/hpasjr #socialmedia […]
@Robin Don’t misunderstand me, I DO mix personal and professional in social media. My blog and especially my Twitter account are very human, very social and personable. I’ve passed the 80/20 and probably at 60/30 on business vs. personal tweets, with 10 for just chatting, conversations.
Now for ME LinkedIn is strictly business. Facebook crosses over audiences, so while I have some business “friends” an update about my company or a blog post that really got me fired up wouldn’t make sense shared to mostly old school friends. They’re the “wrong” audience for that, so it comes back to Dan’s point about doing it “right.”
@Dan Agree there may not be a definitive “right” or “wrong” in social media and yet, I quickly found what did not work for ME: spammy auto-DMs, programmed tweets just broadcasting all day, popups ads hyping your e-book, etc. I break the rules, notably by not blogging every day or even every week (trying for a little more). I agree with you on the real world networking. Social is great, but I don’t want to limit myself there when there may be a pool of small businesses right outside more door.. looking for someone to help them get social, help them get it “right”.. so I am back to Robin.
@Robin I’m trying to find the balance between social/online and real-world networking. To me balance is everything in work, play, wine, the checkbook… all needs balance. I’ve made great contacts in the industry online, but need to make more contacts in my own backyard with potential clients. It is a catch, one I’ve yet to solve.
Social is work, it helps me do more, be better at my job. Trust me, I can walk away from the Twitter when I need to, be productive. ITA that social is not for everyone; you shouldn’t be there “just because.” You need an endgame, a plan for using that FB page, that Twitter account and a way to turn that engagement from awareness to sales, loyalty, advocacy, etc. ROI rears its head. FWIW.
Dear Acronym Queen, what is ITA?
I think Dan has a point on not setting up definitive “rights” or “wrongs,” but on the other hand, there are some things that just don’t work – like the auto-DMs, etc., that I personally feel confident in saying they’re “wrong.” Having said that, now someone will come along and show me business results graphically illustrating that they do work… but again, that kind of stuff is not for me.
Balance is really the key, isn’t it?
Davina, I follow the advice of Denise Graveline from don’t get caught communications with much of my social networking. The idea that she espouses is that all of your online profiles, accounts, etc., should be a mix of professionla and personal. She likens it to a cocktail party or going to a business networking event. You don’t spend the whole time talking about business. You usually connect with people on a more personal level as well — talking about your latest vacation or something fun/cool you did over the weekend. So much of my “talk” on social networking sites is a combination of promoting things I’m doing for Johns Hopkins or Women Grow Business and also my personal life. I figure if I’d talk about it at a cocktail party or networking event, then I can talk about it here.
It’s interesting that you’re talking about trying to step away from the tools and go to more events. I find I’m going to fewer events, but that I’m still as social and staying connected with people because of social media. And by going to fewer events, I’m getting more done for my job and I’m more productive. It’s a catch 22, I guess.
Dan, I think the why is a good question. I sometimes have people asking for my advice on their social media presence. They just a ssume they need a Facebook page and a Twitter page and a LinkedIn group. I tell them to step back and figure out what they’re trying to accomplish and how to accomplish it. Don’t be in the social media space just to be there. I have yet to create a FB page, LI group, or Twitter account for my place of business because I don’t think we’re ready to be there. I’d rather us wait and then do it “right.” And while we’re on the topic of doing it “right” — would you be more comfortable with the idea of how to be more “effective” in the social media sphere vs. how use it the “right” way?
… and this is why I love you, Robin, because you’re walking the walk.
Honestly, I don’t know if I’ve found a middle ground just yet, when it comes to balancing online and offline time. I’ve found it necessary to start shutting down my online time for the sake of sanity, my eyes and my marriage (very important, that last one). On the other hand, I’ve also found that now I am being invited to so many more offline events, because of my online activity/presence/whatever you want to call it, that I can’t go to them all. Time was, IABC ruled my life (especially this year, since I was president of the local chapter). But there are only so many events I can go to IRL without getting exhausted, not to mention not letting client work slip, and that’s why I have to select and balance them all very carefully.
Shonali — you just brought up a HUGE point for me re: balancing social media/online convos and in-person convos. And it’s something I really hadn’t thought about.
It’s your point about shutting down online time for your marriage. As a new parent, I’ve been “whittling down” my after-hours appearances at networking events, dinners, etc., because evenings are my times with my daughter. The great thing about social media is that I can sit downstairs on my laptop “after hours” — once my daughter is in bed — and do some of the networking online that I would have been doing in person pre-family.
Online convos and social media are allowing some of us to achieve better work-life balance.
Robin, I think it can certainly help in some ways. I was never one to go to a ton of offline networking events to begin with; I always did those very sparingly. Not because I don’t like meeting people, but because family and work are a priority with me. Plus, as I said earlier, I’ve been so involved with IABC, it pretty much ruled my after hours networking and professional development life; I remember, when Mark Oswell was running Capitol Communicators Group, I only made it to one happy hour that CCG held, even though the CCG events were terrific, because there was invariably a conflict with IABC.
Now, there has been such a great ballooning of events thanks to social media, tweetups, TED making inroads in DC, etc., that it’s almost more difficult for me to decide which ones to go to! So again, I have to pick them carefully. And I’m trying to be more aware of not immersing myself in social so much – after all, it’s so easy to spend time chatting on Facebook and/or Twitter, you don’t even know where the time goes – that my “real” life takes a beating. My husband is very good about it, but I’ve started re-examining my own behavior so that things don’t come to an inadvertent head, as it were.
I’m also trying to be more aware of what my mind and body need in terms of staying healthy and energized. A big one for me here is taking breaks from the computer, and getting enough sleep. The last couple of days, I’ve been trying to go to bed earlier (I was always an early bird, you’ll laugh if I tell you what my “perfect” bed time is!), since it helps me get up early; that, in turn, gives me some time to wander around online, which means during “normal” business hours, I can focus more on client-related work (though when that means I have to be on socnets, I am), without feeling I’m not talking to my friends on socnets.
Shonali,
I sometimes have a problem when people discuss the “right” and “wrong” ways to be social. Especially on platforms like twitter & facebook because they’re free to use. Whenever you make something available to the masses, people are not always going to agree how to use it.
Social media is a lot like the real world – some people do things in a manner that we agree with and some people don’t. Ultimately, people that are social in the off-line world, that know how to build relationships & network with other like-minded professionals, will be successful on social media platforms.
For me, online “conversation” has no real value other than being the first contact to a possible friendship or business relationship. We have to break through the online wall (phone call, meet-up, etc) for the relationship to have a chance to really flourish. That’s why most of my business comes through face-to-face networking either through business groups, chambers of commerce, or volunteering my services at local non profit organizations.
“Engagement” is overrated. The question is not “are we walking the walk?” but “why?”. I know why I’m here, how bout you?
Hug.
I love that you ended that with a hug, Dan. :)
I do understand your reaction to “right” and “wrong,” and it’s something I often feel too. But there are some things, as I mentioned in my reply to Robin, that are just so silly, that they are, IMHO, “wrong” – like the incessant auto-DMs, and so on.
Your point about online conversation being the first step to a “real” friendship or business relationship is spot on, and I wouldn’t argue with that at all. I suppose there are those who do it because it makes them feel good and nothing else; it certainly makes me feel good too, but I don’t think I felt particularly bad about myself before, i.e. I’m not trying to fill a hole somewhere. Not that I’m saying that’s why some do it… ok, enough caveats to this comment on a comment, LOL.
Actually – when I saw your tweet, saying “does it matter,” it may have given me an angle for another post… so thank you!
Shonali,
It also makes me feel good, too. I’ve gotten a lot of smiles & laughter from my time on twitter. My wife thinks I enjoy it a bit too much at times. Would be nice to get to meet certain people face-to-face one day but I know that won’t always be possible.
So I’ll just go one enjoying my time, developing relationships, and occasionally causing trouble ;)
Yes, I enjoy that camaraderie too, Dan, and it’s made a huge difference when I actually meet some of these folks IRL; we feel like we already know each other, at least a little. I think you made a really interesting point, though, about the reason for conversing online in the first place.
Stacy — I find your comment interesting. I hope you do write on this topic and then post a link to your post here so that we can all find it.
I used to subscribe to this school of thought adamantly, Shonali. But truth be told, after a while, this “social media” stuff has made me consciously LESS social both in person and online, and I have my reasons. I’ll hopefully be expounding on those in a future blog post.
That’s really interesting, Stacy; like Robin, I can’t wait to read it.
Shonali, I’ve said this before on other platforms but you were one of the people when I was a Twitter newbie who actually talked to me. Now that we have connected in multiple spaces, I am delighted with continuing the conversation.
I totally agree with this post. For me, everything is about the conversation, which is why I love it when people talk back to me. We are all busy and we do need to use Twitter or the other platforms to move out our messages and posts but for me, people need to trust me before it even matters.
I think even for large companies, people are starting to make decisions on the recommendations of their friends… on social media and in normal networking forums and backyard fences. But we have more ways of learning more than ever before in the history of the world. It is time to keep the conversation flowing.
Thanks for being a connection!
That’s a very nice thing to say, Julie – thank you! Have you found that you’re doing anything different (or more, or less) as you try to talk to more people?
The number of posts I produce is much higher than it was in the beginning and I use multiple platforms. I find that even though I am busy, I meet really great people who get it on blogs that have active bloggers who are passionate about life and whatever content they are expert in. My connections literally span the globe but they start with small comments you might make to the person next door.
That is exactly what I was wondering, Julie. Thank you!
Shonali, Those are all good questions for those of us who are “social” professionally. Comes back to are you really other there, or just broadcasting. I tweet, share, link back and comment on other blogs more than my own.
And yet the most social thing about me is that I’ve kept my own voice, my own style. I’m upfront that while I enjoy being out here and making social friends, it’s also very much part of my job, business. It’s not an act, automated or programmed, so if I’m not tweeting, means I’m someplace else working or goofing off or just doing the laundry. ;-)
My only quibble is the Facebook part, as many of my FB are like me: that’s our personal space, a way to connect and share with friends, old and new.. but not the world. IDK.. it’s just that FB’s not about the professional or being “social;” just a fun, easy way to share photos and play games and slack off from work.
Kicking it up: step away from the tools. I’m making time to attend more meetings, go to small business groups and TweetUps, to network in PERSON. Reminds me of a @Soulati tweet and blog post I need to finish (so thanks!) and just gave me another idea:
Taking the social out of the social networking. Which is to say, get together to talk about things OTHER than social media and PR; maybe some of us get together and just talk/tweet about our favorite wines or TV shows for 30 minutes. Who knows where it can lead? FWIW.
Heh, I’m looking forward to that post now, Davina!
Yes, I do think it’s important to get together and talk about things other than SM & PR. It can be tough for us, I know. As you say, that could lead to a whole new world… part of the “unanticipated consequences” of “networking,” I guess.
Heh, that post is in draft.. along with so many others.
Write it! Please!!!
Working on it, along with one I HOPE to finish in a latter tonight. Sucks being a perfectionist sometimes. :-)
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Shonali Burke and Andy Donovan, Krista Giuffi. Krista Giuffi said: Do you walk the walk on #socialmedia? Check out latest from @Shonali and join the conversation: http://bit.ly/hWmtYW #pr #blogging […]
I love how simple and direct Robin’s question is.
We can espouse the benefits of being social, but are WE actually living up to those?
Earlier this year, I wrote similarly about what I call “social media awesome:” http://thebuzzbymikeschaffer.com/2010/04/11/are-you-social-media-awesome/
I reread that post often and will be sure to keep Robin’s thoughts in mind!
Thanks for sharing, Mike, and for stopping by! Stacy’s comment is very interesting as well, though; does all the tweeting and Facebooking actually make us “less” social, and if so, how? I’m noodling…
Great topic to pose for discussion! I have found through conversations via blog comments and Twitter that social media has become much more enriching for me. I admit, I still have to work on my nature as an introvert. But it’s worth starting up a conversation because it often results in more connections to new content.
Krista, I think one of the interesting things about social networks is that they are almost perfect for introverts, in that they allow people like you and me (I’m actually quite introverted as well) to connect despite what might be an innate shyness, because it’s not as “in your face” as offline connection. The beauty, of course, is when the online connections lead to offline ones.