between parenthesesThis may be the crown jewel in my Wall of Shame for bad pitches thus far. Note what I’ve bolded …

Hi

I’m <name>, I’m a tech writer and I’m looking for opportunities to contribute interesting and original articles to relevant blogs and websites like (insert site here)

Would you be interested in me writing a free article for your site?  I specialize in articles related to the internet, satellite TV, mobile broadband, 4G LTE and mobile phones. If you think something like this might appeal to your audience, please get back in touch and I will send over some suggestions for topics that I have in mind.

I understand your site is all about social media and public relations, but I know that I can write an article that pretains to something about social media in the mobile phone world.

Let me know if this sounds of interest?

Thank you,

I almost fell for it until I saw the (insert site here) bit at the end of the first sentence (which doesn’t even technically end, since there’s no period).

Gotta love anything that gives you a laugh, right?

Happy Friday!

Image: jox. via Flickr, CC 2.0

Shonali Burke
Founder and publisher of Waxing UnLyrical, Shonali Burke helps purpose-driven brands bring big ideas to life. She teaches at The Johns Hopkins University, has gone back to school herself with the Harvard Business Analytics Program, and is creator/lead instructor at The Social PR Virtuoso® online training hub , where ambitious PR pros learn how to unleash their inner Social PR superheroes. Owned by Lola the Basset Hound, she's mad about ABBA, bacon, cooking, dogs, and Elvis, though not necessarily in that order. Wouldn't you like to be in her kitchen?
Shonali Burke
Shonali Burke

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