Guest Post by Steff Metal
Blogging, Tweeting, Tumbling, Facebooking, Formspringing, checking your Klout score, commenting on Flickr, reading your Reader, keeping up-to-date with online communities and discussion boards …
… and that’s just on Monday.
All this online “connecting” is starting to do my head in.
I don’t know how you all do it.
Really, I am in awe!
How do you manage making quality connections with hundreds of people all over the world, while still finding time to do your work – the work that actually pays your bills – spend time with your family and friends, indulge your hobbies and sleep at night?
I realized the other day that I missed my husband.
No, he hasn’t gone away.
In fact, he’s right here in the house with me, just down the hall.
But I feel like I haven’t seen him for weeks.
I am, however, caught up on my RSS Reader.
I have replied to people on Twitter and read several dozen random blog articles.
My husband is the most important person in my life (beside the cat, Levi, who declares herself to be the most important person in everybody’s life).
He makes me laugh more than any comedic blog post, he knows how to make any situation a fun time, and he gives better hugs then any emoticon sent through Facebook.
But I was spending less time with him than I was with people thousands of miles away.
I married him, not my Twitter feed, and sometimes I forget that.
Sometimes, I get caught up in the momentum of this Internet “thing” I’ve created, this endless hub of community and communication, sometimes I forget who I did it all for in the first place.
So I’ve been pulling back.
First, I cleared out my Google Reader. Where once it held subscriptions to over 100 sites, it now boards only ten.
Checking it each morning takes 15 minutes, instead of an hour twice a day.
I added some of my favorite tweeters to lists, and once a week, I browse through those lists.
I’ve stopped having Twitter open while I work, because it makes my work take twice as long, and those are hours I could be spending with my family.
I stopped checking Facebook updates every seven minutes.
And then, I stopped signing up for every site someone said would be the “next big thing.”
And, hardest of all, I cut back on updating my blog.
I realized two-to-three quality posts per week would help me more than the four-to-five not-quite-as-good-as-normal-but-sort-of-OK posts I’d been doing.
I feel simultaneously relieved and guilty.
I adore every single person who reads my work, comments on my blog or my posts on Waxing UnLyrical.
I love every retweet, every reply, every email.
But I am only one woman.
I have only 24 hours a day, and I like spending as many of those hours as possible with the flesh-and-blood people who make my life so truly wonderful.
Just because you don’t see me around so much anymore, doesn’t mean I don’t care.
I’m still instantly reachable, should you ever need me.
I still check in all the time.
There’s just this wonderful man standing at the door to my office wanting to bake cookies together, and he has this beautiful smile.
And I can’t say no.
Image: scubadive67 via Flickr, CC 2.0
Steff Metal is a writer, artist and heavy metal maiden living in NZ with her cantankerous drummer husband and their medieval sword collection. Join the Grymm & Epic community for creative entrepreneurs, or read her heavy metal blog on Steff Metal.
[…] read Steff Metal’s guest post on Shonali Burke‘s blog, Waxing Unlyrical where I was moved to tears as I was reminded to remember what really matters in life. And just as […]
I don’t believe in my heart, that there is a single human being unable to relate to this! I have the same thoughts on a daily basis! I miss favorite shows, forget about housework for awhile, etc., etc.!!! I do not feel guilty about the things or people in my life that make me happy. I started some time ago, keeping a Happiness Journal. At the end of the day I spend time with me. I write 3 statements concerning the things that made me the happiest. At that point, I write 3 statements concerning my soul. It goes something like this:
1) Writing today made me very happy.
2)Cooking and baking today was such a joy!
3)Loving the people around me and Queen Jazzy Furball, as usual, makes me one of the happiest and most blessed people in the world. Oh, by the way, Queen Jazzy is a big, long haired, happy cat I found in a parking lot in Altamont Springs, FL over 3 years ago. My life would not be the same without her.
I really, really, really want to WRITE!
I really, really, really want to COOK AND BAKE!
I really, really, really want to love, pray and meditate everyday of the rest of my life!
I don’t take on anyone else’s baggage anymore. Heaven knows by the young age of 52, I have too much of my own to take on yours or anyone else’s. This does not mean I don’t care about you with all my heart and soul. It simply means that I don’t have time to worry any more. I have a very small box that I made out of cardboard and clippings that I call my GOD box. If, at the end of the day there are any problems on my mind, I simply write them down and deposit them in the box. While I am sleeping, God takes care of those things and amazingly, they seem awfully small by the time I wake up in the morning! Have a wonder-filled day!
Aw, thank you all. I’m so glad this post has stuck a chord with people!
And the cookies, which were triple chocolate, have mostly been eaten. I feel slightly ill. The good kind of chocolate-filled ill.
LOVED this post – I feel like every time I take time away from the office like this, or am not constantly checking in, that I am being judged by those that do and are. But, i could not survive constantly attached to twitter, facebook and blogging. I absolutely need to spend time outside of this tech world. Thanks for the reminder that it really is okay :)
@HowieSPM@nittygriddyblog or @ginidietrich would say).
You know how I found Steff, btw? Through thursday bram@wgbiz bloggers. Thursday is one of the founders of Constructively Productive (http://www.constructivelyproductive.com/), and Steff had a guest post up there. I was fascinated by her writing, approached her to write here, and there you go.
And of course I left an F out. Do I get an F for typing Stef instead of Steff? LOL BTW cookies when do they get here?
Great post Stef! This is interesting. I saw Peter Shankman speak not long ago. I like Peter a lot. As a person especially. Very kind and thoughtful man. He has had an interesting life. Social Media turned him into a personal brand. He lives social media and being connected 24/7. After 80% of his talk to a room full of professionals looking for insights on how to harness Social for their businesses, Peter started deviating from my view on things. He forgets he is unique. He feels everyone will be living their life completely exposed and connected digitally. But I don’t. I won’t. I can’t. I have flowers to stare at. Trees to sit under. Clouds to watch pass by.
It is very healthy to disconnect. If you need help or support Tweet me, hit me up on Facebook, send me an email, or an SMS text ok 8)